1. 3. 2017 – ARE YOU BUSY? THEN YOU HAVE A PROBLEM…
Do we live in the world of ‘busyness’ or the world of ‘business’?
Doesn’t it seem strange to you that the words ‘busyness’ and ‘business’ are similar?
Whenever I ask someone how they are, the reply is almost always a variation of ‘I’m busy’. A more or less unhappy face is quickly changing to mock happiness, which should persuade me as well as the person themself that everything is just fine. To be busy has become normal.
At the same time we have given up our responsibility for our own time-management. We all have the same amount of time, each day – 24 hours, 1 440 minutes, 86 400 seconds. What is YOUR CHOICE going to be?
There will always be plenty to do. But being busy doesn’t mean being effective. We have given up on the fact that it could be done differently. We came to believe that it is how it should be. We say we cannot change it. If you cannot, you cannot – it is your choice.
It is the same with everything. The answer is to be found inside of ourselves your head. But sometimes you have to dig deep. You cannot stop the waves but you can learn how to surf. Imagine that you can choose between being busy or working effectively and in your own rhythm. What is YOUR CHOICE going to be?
So, why do we actually like “being busy”?
- It gives us a sense of importance which we cannot give ourselves. We expect that people around us will look up to us and our value will increase but it will not. Our personal value and importance come from within, not from people around us. Other people feel it the same way and that is why we all play the game of who is the busiest and who is the most important.
- Euphoria and satisfaction. Being busy is like a drug, like a shot of adrenalin. Being busy is considered cool… Something is happening and that could be exciting. We are flooded with endorphins but afterward, we have to pay with extreme tiredness and exhaustion. So, we go back for another dose, tomorrow … or maybe even later today?
- It allows us not to focus on what is really important. And all this is something happening inside us. Busyness is one of the best strategies for avoiding paying attention to our needs and overlooking what is really important. Most of the time this could be hard work, unpleasant or even painful, so it much better to hide behind being busy.
And what have YOU been avoiding?
1) Choice and responsibility
It really is only YOUR CHOICE to feel relaxed and comfortable. Every time you are ‘busy” admit (without judging yourself) that it is your choice and it is not your boss, colleagues, family, traffic jam or company, (etc.), that caused your busyness. The least you would gain is control.
2) Change your way of thinking and speaking.
Try to figure out when you keep saying ‘I am busy’ what the reasons for it are and why you cannot change it. What emotions can you feel? Choose new programs with positive emotions.
3) Start to play at your inner field.
How you can recognize the beginnings of ‘being busy’. It could start with an increased speed-walking, panicking, doing things without thinking, skipping lunch, feeling edgy whenever somebody disturbs you, not being able to concentrate or with an increased level of stress and blood pressure, making more mistakes, etc. The key is to uncover your own indicators of falling into the stage of busyness. Take your time, just observe with no judgement.
4) Use STOP technic
As soon as you start feeling busy and losing control, slow down and stop yourself. Try to step back, think, organize your thoughts and then carry on. Ask yourself: “What is the most important right now? (and everything’ is not the correct answer).
5) Use the three magic questions
What am I controlling right now?
What am I trying to control at the moment?
What am I not controlling now and I could be?
6) Close your day
Stop before the end of your work day and consciously close your working process. Switch off your mobile phone, close your inbox and recap what you have achieved. Realise the amount of work you have done and praise yourself. Most probably all the jobs you haven’t done will start bubbling up too. Plan ahead. Set the three most important jobs for the next day and also confirm the deadline for your unfinished jobs from today. I recommend finding a partner with whom you can talk about it. Being able to verbalize it – especially at the beginning before it becomes a habit – is very important.