1. 11. 2016 – FEEDBACK 2.0
Clients who has been coming to me last few months and 5 workshops on giving (and receiving) feedback which I led on job fair HR days in Prague show me how, this important capability is underestimated and difficult, despite the fact, many people from majority of organizations attend regularly many trainings on giving feedback. I have made few interesting observations, during conversation with my clients and during workshops, which might help you to be better, not only at giving feedback but actually at receiving it as well.
Fortunately there is no universal manual for giving feedback which works for everyone and at any time. Each of us need to create our own manual which reflects and respects our personality and grey zones when giving and receiving feedback. Most of manuals which people get at training sessions, ended up in desk drawer, people don’t remember them and don’t open them anymore after the training. We don’t need to writte it down because we keep our own manual in our heads. Simply it is there, inside of us.
What is my intention? Very important question which leads us through a process of giving feedback. Having “right” and true intention, help us to be really authentic to other person and to be aware of our own goals. Sometimes people give feedback to get more significance and importance, rather than help others to move forward. If our intention is selfish, probably our ego takes over the lead and we might not give other people enough freedom to deal with our feedback as they wish.
People don’t see people in front of them while giving feedback. They see roles and positions only or people who needs to be fixed. By seeing others as human beings and not roles helps other side to accept our feedback, not feel criticized and attacked, therefore they accept feedback better. People are perfect and have their value as they are and don’t need to be fixed. At least we should try different approach and be more kind rather then though when giving feedback.
Giving feedback is common managerial and communication tool. Having this mindset, makes us giving feedback much more easier. There is nothing special about that, it is only tool. At all positions, through whole organization, we must give feedback in an appropriate way. By giving feedback we express our needs, our opinions and our expectation. If we don’t do this we are not authentic and we kill our potential for organization. We create hidden barriers, obstacles and conflicts in communication and relationships.
Last but not least. The main reason why we find giving feedback difficult lies mostly in our emotions. Emotions are most important aspect of giving feedback. People don’t know how to say it, they don’t feel well and they don’t want (or they want) hurt and humiliate others. We need to find out ways how to feel comfortable and calm. We can only find these ways inside of ourselves, not outside on internet. We are responsible for our own emotions as well others are responsible for their emotions.
